HAVING A ROUGH DAY!

I woke up this morning not feeling well at all.The furnace guys are here working ,my neck hurts and the sears repairman will be here later to look at my wash machine that went on the brink.I cancelled the chiro today as i am feeling crappy and if its the flu don't want to give it to anyone.
I am so depressed about not being able to get our Jaxson home.This is pure ridiculous.3 babies that had families committed have died in Liberia during this wait to come home.This is killing me thinking that something like this could happen to Jaxson.These special needs kids who have families should be allowed to come home.Not linger in orphanages in Liberia where they pass because of the bureaucratic crap that is going on in Liberia.My heart breaks for these 3 families this should of NEVER happened.These kids had medical issues that could have saved them if they were in America to get the proper treatment.Instead they were held up and their innocent lives were lost leaving the adoptive families crushed and heart broken.
I know the love i have for Jaxson and of something were to happen like this i don't think i could bear the thought.Is this going to end? when will I parent my child?When will i hold him and rock him ?when he is sick doesn't he needs a mommas caring hand to make him better or hold him when he is sad?This is not fair!I am trying to be strong and trying to just go with the flow.That said it is NOT easy and i have to vent sometimes to get it all off my chest.I just want to parent my child.