LAYING LOW

I have not posted on my blog much.I have been so down about this adoption it is hard and i just don't have much to say.I unpacked Jaxson's suitcase awhile back and now i am in process of emptying his dresser.It is full of summer clothes and there is now way it will be warm when he comes home.So i am back to putting his winter things back out.
I have taken my time with it as the remodels my house is a cluttered mess with nowhere to put things at the moment.I hope to get pics soon and show the progress.Michael just about has all the tile down in the bathroom.Our laundry room is painted and the cabinets are stained.They need varnished and once done are ready to hang.My bedroom still needs painted and we still have carpet to purchase for the floor.I am in search of a professional to lay he carpet.
The kids seem to be enjoying school.Rebecca is still not sure about her school she is in 8Th grade and in the high school.Her first week and she came home with a problem and asked my advice.A boy at school made a racial comment to her.It upset her and she said she didn't know if she should tell.This boy did the same thing LAST year.I told her she needs to tell because that is JUST not acceptable.The following morning she went to the office and talked with school counselor and the principle.The two girls that were with her when the comment was made also told.This boy got 3 days out of school for this.Last year he got told not to say t again and NOTHING so that gave him the opportunity to think its OK.IT IS NOT OK.I am proud of her and told her she did the right thing as she does not deserve to be talked to in that manner.WAY to Go Rebecca.
I have been dealing with some things of my own here at home.My cousin and best friend has made a rough decision to leave her husband.She has been staying with us.She got a NICE 2 bedroom house she is renting for 300.a month.Allot of people freak out as the rent is cheap for a very NICE house.But we are in a small farming community.Population of 5,000 so rent is cheaper here and cheaper to buy a home here.This has been very hard on her..her 2 children are taking it better then expected but they knew there was tension in the home.The house is only 2 blocks from where she did live she did this so her children can be close to both parents and not feel so pulled and pushed.Today is her moving day.the Landlord live 4 hrs away and is coming today to fix a busted pipe and fix a couple other things.All her furniture is in the house now and today she will be spending the day cleaning and putting things away.Please pray for her this was a very hard decision for her I am here for support and not to judge her for her decision.
I am waiting on new pics of Jaxson as soon as i receive them i will post them.I am praying for something to happen and soon see all the Liberian angels come home to their families.Please pray it is soon is been 9 months sense the Moratorium was put in place and its time to get things running and get these children home to their families.

NOT MUCH HAPPENING!

Its been fairly quiet around home.This is the kids first week back to school .Linda caught the flu and has been home 3 days and returning to school tomorrow.Poor child was not happy to get this sick the first week of school.Michael has been working hard on laying the tile in the bathroom.I get to start staining cabinets tomorrow for the laundry room.
Landen has done better then i anticipated this week with school.Usually its a 4 week adjustment but he seems to love it.He comes home and says i go to school.He then proceeds to tell us about his day which sounds like babble but its cute that he is trying so hard communicate with words.
No word on our adoption.I did email the agency and ask for pictures height and weight and she is trying to get those for us. I am praying that this is close to being resolved and we can get him home soon. We could use lots of prayers..the Holidays are upon us and i am PRAYING he is home to share them with us.

THRIFT SHOPPING AND MORE

I love a good bargain and i love going to thrift stores.I have gone to two and found GREAT buys at both.I got Landen a wooden rocking horse a big one that he can ride without his legs being to long.HE LOVES IT! I also got a cute shadow box for all my little nicknack's.I have been looking for one but wanted the right one.
Today... I found Landen brown pants,a super nice short sleeve striped top and a camo turtleneck to wear with same pants for winter.I also found a super NICE stroller for Jax.I got it for 5 dollars and its in great shape.Landen also got a sweater navy blue with American flag on it and couple more long sleeve shirts.
I have been looking for things for our new bedroom.I didn't find what i was looking for but i am sure i will eventually.Taking my time with purchases as i know what i want and will get it sometime.I need to get busy and stain new cabinets for the laundry room.Michael has been Laying the tile in the bathroom and my dad has been wonderful about coming over and doing the painting.He is a professional...He did it for a living and he is fast and its perfect.
The kids are back at school.I will be popping in soon to check out the schools.They shut two grade schools down and now have k through 2 in 1 grade school. 3rd through 6 in middle school and 7 through 12 in high school.It is not working out like they expected.The buildings are not big enough for as many kids they have in the schools.I am going to check it out as i am worried with some of the things Linda has told me about school.I know the buses are overcrowded and it is creating a problem as well. None of the parents in the community wanted this school change but we as parents did not have a say.I am very concerned and feel it is time i check out this mess as Linda calls it.
No word on Jaxsons adoption and i am beginning to get restless again.I just want something some word about whats going on.I did email and also ask if possible to get a new picture and current weight and height.I have not got a weight and height on him for a very very long time.I pray every night that soon our Jax and all the Liberian babies home to their families.

MMMM CAKE!

Landen Loves cake!The blue frosting turned his teeth blue.

THE WEEKEND!

This weekend has been a beautiful one!The weather has been wonderful not to cold and not so stinking hot you cant stand it.We have accomplished allot around the house this weekend so that is nice.I have been asked Multiple times this weekend about our Jax.It id hard to explain to them when their is nothing to report.They don't understand and have a ton of questions.Not easy for me because i DON'T understand either.
All my kids start school tomorrow.I am so excited and they are too!Tonight i will have to make sure Landen's clothes are laid out.The girls and my 2 boys are also good at laying out their things so it makes their mornings go allot smoother around here.Tomorrow i am off to the gym for my workout... have some errands to run then home to enjoy the day.Hope every has had a great weekend.

Back to School!

Rebecca was none to excited!She ended up having a great day and loved her new school.

Landen was cold!It was chilly this morning.Monday i will make sure he has a jacket.

Rebecca and Landen waiting for the bus.

Today was Rebecca and Landen's first day back to school.Rebecca was not excited at all.Landen was though and he came home happy and said he had fun at school.Although it wore him out and he went to bed at 7:30 pm all on his own.

UPDATE IN MILLER HOUSE!

The kids start school soon.Landen and Rebecca start this Friday and the teenagers start on Monday.Landen keeps asking about school because i have mentioned it to him trying to prepare him for the routine change.He never takes to it and his first 4 weeks are so rough on him.
The house remodels are going good we are painting it out now and then flooring will be done.I am ready for it to get finished and get my home back in order.I have NOTHING to share about Liberia at this time.I pray everyday that something good happens.At this point it Will be a miracle if he is home in time for Christmas.

NOT SLEEPING

Here i go again not sleeping!I cant stop thinking bout Jax!I ache to hold him in my arms and its driving me mad.Why oh why cant i go get my little man?It is 4:47 am and i cant sleep i have laid down like 4 times and cannot fall asleep.I need Jax home and my family will be complete and i can sleep peacefully knowing we are all here and together.I have not received an update in awhile which is also made this wait hard.I also understand there is really nothing to update at this time.I love this sweet innocent little boy so much and it pains me he cant be with his mommy who aches to love and care for him.I pray every night for God to keep him safe and not let it be much longer that Jax can be with his family.I just want our little boy home.

BAD WEEKEND!

I do not want a repeat of this weekend at all.My son's girlfriend moved to Missouri a month ago with her birth family.Sometimes meeting birth families just don't work out and this is the CASE.Birth mom loves her daughter..but her mom does not which created allot of friction as birth mom lives with her parents and takes care of them.Birth mom has loopus and is in hospital for a blockage in her kidney which is not good as she only has one kidney.While in hospital birth Gra ma convinced everyone it was sons gf fault mom was in hospital.
Sons gf called us Friday night and said she was beat up bye bi moms friends as they accused her of putting her mom in hospital(childish if i say so myself).Gf was kicked out and stayed the night at some different neighbors house.Gf called again last night that they kicked her out and she had nowhere to go.Police came and gf filed charges on the attack.She tried to go to a shelter but they said she did not fit criteria.Cops did not know what to do and dropped her at gas station.WHAT THE HECK?
I cannot leave her homeless and WONT i am not mean and o way did she deserve what she got.I drove the 6 hrs and picked her up and brought her back home.The catch is..BIRTH MOM has no idea they did this to her.I am appauled at this family.Birthmom loves her daughter and did want to give her up9was 17 and this was baby 3)Birthmom did fight to keep her but it was not to be so.Birthmom seeked her and found her.IT is sad because BIRTHMOM wants her but the rest of them will not accept her.It breaks my heart.Gf is with us for a few days.I am taking her to get hep and try to get her moved in her own place.Wish us luck as we try to rebuild this broken Bird and get her back on her feet.

IRRITATED SHOPPING WITH MY GIRLS.

I took the girls shopping today to get new shoes and school supplies for them.I will take the boys next week.This was the WORST shopping trip ever.For starters both girls were mad at me because i would not take them to the mall shopping.Then the shoe store was big ordeal when my 14 yr old got mad because i refused to buy her a pair of 103.00 shoes.
They did not need many clothing items as they just went shopping in colorado but thought they were going to benefit twofold on clothing.I was so upset with my girls.They Know mom has to budget every dollar that comes in this house.They know we dont BUY Expensive shoes...If you look around at stores you can get Nikes alot cheaper which is what we did.I was so mad and frustrated at them for their actions we left and came home.I told My husband he can take them shopping next time because they were being little pain in the butts lol.
I cant believe they acted like this..I have taught them what a value of a dollar is and how to make it stretch.I have taught them you can get Nice clothes that are like the expensive ones and just as good quility for cheaper elsewhere.I taught them to shop in thriftstores and yardsales to fine super nice stuff.I was appauled at their behavior today.I told them both if they want expensive things they need to get busy doing little jobs..Babysetting,mow lawns whatever to buy those things they really dont need.For now on i will take the boys shopping and Michael can take the girls.Bad behavior today costed them much at home!

RANDOM STUFF

All the mudding is done one the dry wall.Michael is sanding it now and next step is PAINT.I cant believe we are so close to having this done Finally.I still need to purchase some material and cabinets and things for Bedroom and Bathroom but it is getting.
I will be happy when its done and we can focus on other things.The kids start school in a week I still need to shop for supplies and shoes.Tomorrow we are going to get the stuff they need .Talk going broke getting school supplies good grief lol.My cousin and i have our schedule planned out.When kids go back to school we start our work out sessions at the YMCA.I have put on some pounds over the summer and really need to get them off.They have daycare which will come in handy when Jax comes home.Although my husband will more then likely watch him as he don't go to the YMCA with me.
Once Our bedroom is finished i can focus on getting Landen and Jaxson's room in shape.I need to go through Jaxson's clothes and start pulling out the fall winter wear again.I am bummed about this.I know there is some things he has he will now no longer fit.I just wish they would let me GO GET HIM! I cant express in words how i feel about being caught in this mess.But i can express how much we love this little guy and are anxious to get him home and watch him blossom into the little flower in full bloom.I think Jax has waited long enough its time for him to come home.

PICKING MY GIRLS UP!

I am leaving in less the an hour to pick up my girls from the airport.I miss them and will be happy when i see their sweet faces.They were gone only a week but it seemed allot longer to me.I am happy this week is over.Michael and I really need a night out.I think that is next on our agenda.
The remodels are almost complete on our home so when its done i think a night out to dinner and a hotel are in order for us.We really need some one on one time.We are not doing much making it a low key day here.Picking girls up coming home to work on the piles of laundry that is waiting for my attention.Hope everyone is having a great Hump day.

MY GIRLS

My Girls being silly in Colorado.I miss them lots! They are enjoying their time and have done allot of fun things while there.Sounds like grandma and grandpa aunt Tracy and cousin Presley are spoiling them.I am glad they are enjoying their selves but am looking forward to Wednesday afternoon when they arrive back home.

NICE DAY!

We had a wonderful time at zoo.Minus my husband he stayed home waiting for the electrician who did not bother to show up.We are at a stand still on the remodels until he comes and finishes the wiring.
We left the house at 10 30 am bound for gage park.We got to the zoo and really had a wonderful time.I am sunburned and boy was it ever HOT.We drank lots and rested lots as well.It was so hot allot of the animals were in hiding but it was still fun.After the zoo we went to the park across the street and had a wonderful lunch and let the little ones play for quite sometime.We then rode the small train 1.00 each to ride so was not bad at all.We then loaded up in the cars and went the 2 blocks in the park to the carousel and let Landen and my great niece ride it for.75 cents a ride.
Not all my siblings came but my 2 oldest sisters came and my niece her 2 babies, mom and dad,My oldest son William.brian my nephew Dylan and Landen.My oldest sister had her grandson my great nephew who is almost 7 yrs old.It was so much fun a fun filled day.We no longer got home when it cooled way down the wind came up and the storm came in.
I was not able to get any pictures as Linda has my camera in Colorado right now.I am bummed about no pics it was allot of fun.I cherish these times with my family and my parents.I cant wait until Jax is home and able to enjoy these fun filled trips with his family too.

LATE NIGHT!

I am up late baking brownies for a picnic and zoo trip for tomorrow with my kids,My parents and sisters niece's and nephews.I almost have Landens diaper bag fully packed.Landen got something in his eye today.I flushed it with water but he has rubbed it to the point it is swollen.If its not better tomorrow i may have to take him to er.He kept saying My eye, my eye poor baby did not need this.
I have unpacked Jaxson's suitcase.Why? Because i am discouraged!Seeing his suitcase packed for many months has brought many tears.So i decided to unpack and just wait for our news to come when we can travel and i will repack it.So for now the suitcase sets empty in our closet until further notice.I am washing a load of Landens laundry.I wash his separate from ours because he breaks out to most laundry soaps and it just easier to me this way.I spent lots of time with him today.I love that he is such a smart cookie he cracks me up.The things he does and all the new words he has learned to say this summer.He is my angel and i am so happy to be his momma.
My girls are in Colorado this week i am missing them very much.I am looking forward to the 12Th when they come home.I miss them dearly.Its is not the same around here without them.Hope they are having a joyous time with their Grandma and aunt and cousin.OK enough of my ramblings time to check the brownies.

MISERABLE HOT!

It is horrible hot today!My mom came by this morning Landen,mom and I want to garage sales today.I got some really good buys and was excited .One had adorable baby boy clothes and i got Jax 2 pair of jeans that look BRAND new for 50 cents a pair.I also got a set of bed sheets for my bed BRAND new still packaged for 2.00 WOW!They are super nice and in washing right now to put on my bed.I collect flopsy bunnies and was thrilled i found 3 of them today at a yard sale for 2 dollars each.I had a great time and it was quality one on one with my mom.After we we were done and both tickled with our buys we went out for Lunch.Landen must of been hungry he ate every drop.
Tonight i am making a nice dinner and baking brownies...We are going to the zoo tomorrow with my family and are spending the whole day there.Having a picnic at the park across the street and then the zoo.We will also ride the train and probably the carousel.I wont be able to get pics which i am bummed about because Linda took my camera to Colorado to her grandmas this week.I em enjoying my day right now i am enjoying the the house where t is nice and cool .Michael and Jeff are working on the bathroom plumbing in the addition.Last night Michael and i went and bought all the pant.I am so excited and cannot wait to see the finished results.Our new bedroom will be ready to paint this coming week.
I hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend.I am spending time with my husband tonight and all my guys( my boys).

TWIN!

This is my boy but this is what the other boy looks like!

I just came across a little guy in Liberia who is looking for a home.He looks just like Jaxson.When i seen this little boys pic i was looking at my son.They look so much alike its unreal.He has cerebral palsy like our Jax.He is so adorable! He was also found like our Jax tossed away in the trash and hope and Pray someone finds him.The lord was watching over this little guy too.He was around 18 months when he was found is like 3 or 31/2 now.He is ADORABLE.

Anyone interested in this sweet special needs boy? I hope soon Mine can come home to his family.I hope little Levi also finds a family of his very own.

EMOTIONAL

I have been very emotional lately as every day drags by and no good news on our adoption.I am at whits end and think i just need to step back and take a break.I am tired of hearing.. that cases that have court decrees will be processed to come home.Then hear this is all rumor and that it is not going to happen.
My mom upset me tonight when we were talking and i said when Jaxson comes home.She said...If you even get to bring him home.My heart fell to my feet.Those words effected me so much.A person can only take so much and i am to the point i need to step away leave the computer off.
I am on everyday in hopes to get good news i surf everything i can about Liberia adoptions and all the confusing..yes they are releasing no they are not releasing cases is enough to send anyone over the edge.When is this insanity going to stop?I worry about my child getting sick about his medical care and how unfair it is for him not to know the love of the family he has waiting for him who are going crazy to love him.
To me they are holding my child hostage...he is named our son we are named his parents.This is so wrong to keep him from his family.I am so upset with the government of Liberia and the president right now.The children are the ones who are the victims and are paying for their mistakes.ITS NOT FAIR!

BLOGGER PROBLEMS

I could not get into my Blog at all.It would not accept my password hmmmm.I really dont know what was wrong but i went ahead and changed my password.Lets see if i have future problems.

SPOKE TO SOON!

One Senator could not help me.I got a call this morning and Senator Brownback is going to look into our sons case for us.PLEASE PRAY HE CAN DO SOMETHING to help us get our son home.Was very nice on the phone and needed me to fill in the blanks such as Jax birth date and such.I am praying this can help us get our son home.
PLEASE PRAY TODAY!

RAMBELING

I got some things done and feel i have accomplished something through out my day.I ordered an activity bouncy seat for my soon to be born great niece Elaina. I even had it mailed directly to her door.I worked a little on Jaxson's blanket have more to do on it but it looks cute.Its more then half way done.
Tomorrow i have another day filled with things to do!Chad my sisters bf is coming over to work on the house and maybe Monty too.We will see who shows up.I have to do some more paper things tomorrow make copies of tax info or our adoption and get copies of Williams as well and do a few other things.
I wish i would get a phone call or even an email saying we can go get our son.I am not sleeping well and my stomach is in Knots.I just want him home.I feel a piece of my heart is missing.I don't know what else to do and i don't like not being in control. I just don't get adoption at times and why these countries feel the need to make things so difficult on the children and waiting families.Its been MONTHS sense the suspension and yet NOTHING is being done to correct it.I dint know if i can make it through anymore Holidays without Jax with us. I feel that i am hanging on the edge of a cliff one foot on and one foot off not know what exactly is happening with this adoption and to be truthful it has been very emotional and hard on my whole family.
I have begged my husband to let me go to Liberia to visit Jax.But i know with the financial aspect it is NOT an option.But it does not keep me from trying to find ways to finance my own ticket and Hotel cost.If i can figure that our he would gladly let me go.Any ideas?I save all the money i earn for the little guy i babysit but it does not add up enough for an expensive trip such as this would be.My heart aches to hold him close to me and love him.To meet this little boy that our family has fell in love with.To let him know he has a mommy that loves him so so much.With each passing day it is getting harder.

MONDAY!

Well i heard back from our senators office today .I just got off the phone with them.They informed me there is NOTHING they can do in regards to getting Jaxson's Visa.I am so bummed about this.I do know the Liberian Embassy and MOJ are working on releasing cases but that could take many many months or it could be very very soon.I am praying for the very very soon.Jax has waited a long time to come home to his family.
I am trying to keep positive but as summer is starting to wind down its getting harder and harder.I wish they would of went ahead and let us go get him in February.I am beyond frustrated at this point and want to shout out...LET MY CHILD COME HOME. This is all crazy and is doing none of these children any good to have to wait to come home.We had court he is our SON just let him come home .
PLEASE PRAY....The Embassy and MOJ come to there senses and start releasing these kids to come home to their waiting families.

WHAT MORE CAN HAPPEN!

This has been a horrible week and a half...My son William gets deathly ill and spends days in hospital.I prayed to God to give my son life as we were told his brain was bleeding and were scared to death.My son did not have a bleed but did have viral meningitis and is still on the mend.He is staying with us and while doing so his house was broke into and things were stolen.How can people be so cruel?
Last night my niece was in a car wreck and was very blessed God was watching over her.The car flipped over and she was knocked out.She spent several hours in the er but is OK just black and blue and very sore.All the women in the car were unharmed which was wonderful to hear.
My mom just called me that my oldest brother Jeff had an incident as well last night.His nephew(wife's side) came by the house last night and was starting a fight with Jeff's son in the house.My Brother Jeff was breaking the fight up and asked him to leave and he turned on Jeff.My brother suffered a broken collar bone,broken rib,2 black eyes and a cracked Jaw.What is wrong with people to think they can enter someones Home and beat people up?
I am hoping this week looks up as all my family members get back to health and nothing else bad happens.Tomorrow we are packing Williams belongings in his home and i have to call storage places and see how much a storage until will cost so store William's things.William filled out an application for a janitor position at the schools here and will turn it in tomorrow.He has experience and this would be IDEAL job for him.William wants his own place but knows the one he is in is UNSAFE.He needs to get on his feet before he can afford to live on his own.
Hope everyone is having a nice Sunday!

BEAUTIFUL SATURDAY!

Its is beautiful here today.Spring like weather not hot at all but not cold enough for a jacket.I have turned ac off and opened the windows I LOVE IT.I was in search of wooden letters to paint so i can spell out Jaxson's name and put above his crib.I ran into a real problem and cannot find the letter X. I decided not to buy the letters until i have them all.I will check Hobby lobby and Michael's next week.
I have made very slow progress on getting things ready for Jax.I guess maybe i feel it passes the time until our precious boy comes home so i stretch the projects i am making out.I still have not touched his baby changer..Partly because i have no where at the moment to put it until the remodels are done.I dream of the day i hold him in my arms.I am so ready to meet him.The kids are so excited and cant wait to meet their little brother he is going to be surprised when he gets attention from 6 kids waiting patiently to hold and cuddle him.
I am so blessed... to be the parent of all 7 amazing kids and one amazingly handsome,and caring Husband.Who is also a wonderful father.I cant ask for anything more.Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.We have no plans and its low key .William is on the road to recovery so we are not going anywhere so i can take care of him and make sure he rest.